As we contemplate writing our thoughts this week, we are filled with gratitude and excitement over the engagement of our grandson Tzvi Yehuda Hagler to Esther Hirsch of Passaic. It is a special bracha to be grandparents. We were fortunate enough to be “young grandparents,” which in itself gave us the opportunity, in a strange way, to grow up with our children and grandchildren. Now as Tzvi starts out on this totally new path we remember our beginning and know that there is no way we would be able to share with him both our wondrous moments and challenging ones. Had anyone tried to warn us that there would be times when we questioned our decision about getting married we would have never believed them. There is no point. Exactly in the same way would we ever believe that anyone could comprehend the ecstasy that we felt in each other’s company. We were the epitome of everlasting love and devotion. How would it be possible for anyone else to be like us?
Steps through a lifetime have to be taken slowly and in sync with each other. Even at moments when one would prefer to walk on the other side of the street, the depth of feelings and devotion turn these two individuals into a shadow of one.
Recently, Nina had been having trouble with an inflammation of her eye lid. It was constantly itchy and in turn became red. After much annoyance, a visit was made to the pharmacy, where it was suggested that she use a specific kind of eye drops. It was while having the eye drops put into her eye that we realized, once again, how together we are in everything we do. The gentleness of a hand doing something as mundane as dropping individual drops into an eye is a true feeling of love. Who else would ever understand the need for compassion and gentleness the way a husband and wife feel for each other?
It is these very short intimate moments that we pray for our children and grandchildren to share, where from a very inane act a sudden feeling of great love arrives. It is the desire to have only one person to soothe pain; just as a child reaches out to his mommy or daddy to make his booboo feel better, so is it in a beautiful marriage where the one person who can truly soothe and understand is the beloved partner in a duo. It has certainly been our advice to young couples over the years—that after a short period of time they refrain from gravitating to their parents for words of encouragement and instead depend upon each other for support in an intimate and caring way. The only way that couples are able to grow is to rely and depend upon one another. We hope that we will be able to leave our children and grandchildren a legacy of the phenomenon of a beautiful marriage. By the examples that they have seen from their own parents and from us, we wish that each day of their lives together will be of growth and deepening love.
Tzvi and Esther, our feelings for you both know no bounds and we are so grateful to Hashem that through His hand you were able to find each other. How blessed we all are.
By Rabbi Mordechai and Nina Glick
Rabbi Mordechai and Nina Glick are living in Bergenfield after many years of service to the Montreal Jewish community. Rabbi Glick was the rav of Congregation Ahavat Yisroel as well as a practicing clinical psychologist in private practice. He also taught at Champlain Regional College. The Glicks were frequent speakers at the OU marriage retreats. Nina coordinated all Yachad activities in Montreal and was a co/founder of Maison Shalom, a group home for young adults with special needs. They can be reached at [email protected]